Chapter 21: Tolerating Sissies

As the young minions scrambled at their dear leader's orders, Tiggerpaka sat back comfy-like against a log and warmed himself by the fire.

"Master Tiggerpaka, Sir!"  one of the minions known as Crabbell came crawling on her belly in submission.

"What is it young, minion," The master graciously inquired.

"Master, I have found a large clutch of juicy grubs, sir!"  Crabbell kept her eyes lowered in respect.

"And where are these fine grubs, young minion?"  Tiggerpaka was hungry from his day of great deeds defending the pathetic sissies from the dangers of the forest.

"Sidew is bringing them now, Sir." and Crabbell left at the dismissive wave for Tiggerpaka, but not before she kissed the ring on his finger as a show of love and total submission.


"Lephos-and-nothing!  Where are you?!"  Tiggerpaka demanded.

A young border collie, shivering fearfully approached his master.
"Yes sir!  O gracious and wonderful leader!  What can I do for you?"

Tiggerpaka presented a red ball and threw into the forest.  "Fetch!"  He said and smiled as the border collie ran after it.  "He'll never find it." Smirked Tiggerpaka.  "Dumb dog" He muttered.

At that moment, Sidew the Wimp appeared with a sac of fat juicy grubs.  He offered them as one would offer a sacrifice to a god.  "for you, my master, o great Tiggerpaka!"

"What are these?!" Tiggerpaka stood to inspect the offering.

"The finest, juiciest grubs in the entire forest!" Sidew bowed lowly.

Tiggerpaka picked up one, examined it closely, sniffed it, popped it into his mouth, a bulge forming in one cheek and he looked upwards as if in deep thought.   Then his face turned red in anger and he spit the grub on the ground.  "You insult me with these meager grubs!   Twenty demerits!  Now get out of my sight!"

Sidew the wimp scurried away quickly.  Tiggerpaka muttered about incompetence and settled back against the log when Mistake and Ore returned to the camp with an abundance of game.  The minions waited for Tiggerpaka's permission before being allowed to feast.

"Ah, my dear Mistake!  Welcome back to camp, I see you had a fine hunt despite Ore's company."  Mistake blushed at Tiggerpaka's obvious fondness of her.  

"Well, actually, Tiggerpaka, Sir," Mistake began. "Ore took most of this game, he is a great hunter."

Tiggerpaka laughed.  "Oh, Dear Mistake, I love how you stand up for your friends.  If that is how you wish to tell the story, I understand."  Then he leaned over to her and said, "But really, if you want to be a truth-bender like your ole uncle Tigg, you will have to be more convincing."

A winged wolf entered the camp, I forget her name, but she is the one who couldn't hear so well.  Tiggerpaka approached her and cupped his hands around his mouth and bellowed, "HELLO MY DEAR MINION!  PLEASE JOIN US IN A MEAL"

The winged wolf smiled and picked up her choice of game.  The rest of the minions did the same.  Tiggerpaka smiled at his young minions who admired him so.  He sighed and reached into a hole in the log and found a grub and popped it into his mouth.

As the feast drew to a close, Rat and Brat approached their dear leader and bowed deeply.  "You may speak" Tiggerpaka said with a wave of his hand.

"Sir, would you please allow us the honor of cleaning up this campsite?"  Rat asked.    Brat nodded in agreement.

"Yes, be sure to clean up every bit of gut and brain smatter from this feast.  You minions are slobs, although I know you try your best.  Obviously you were all raised by heathens and know no better."

As the grounds were cleaned and the moon rose in the sky, the coolness of the night lay upon Tiggerpaka and his minions.  Tiggerpaka yawned, then looked at the winged one.  "YOU, THERE, SING US A LULLABY"  he swirled his hand at the command then rolled over and fell a sleep.

The minions, knowing that their dear leader was slumbering peacefully were finally able to ease into their own sleep.




Author's Note:  I am taking over this blog now.  It was boring and I think you will agree that I have elevated to a higher level of entertainment.   You cannot stop me!  I will never reveal my true identity!  You may bow to me now and leave a grub in the bowl.  Sincerely, Tiggerpaka